Splendour In The Grass: Kim’s Thursday & Friday Highlights

The North Byron Parklands gracefully embrace Splendour In The Grass this year, notably with some of the best weather Splendour has witnessed in a dogs age. Ditching our gumboots, we slip on a comfy pair of Docs or Connies to trek through the dusty masses. Under the majestic winter sun, all 32,500 of us are sporting content smiles and keeping friends within close proximity.

Please note: This is not a review of the festival; this will not help you decide whether you will be in attendance next year. I mean, let’s be honest with ourselves now, we say we will never have a straight four day bender ever again, but we probably will. So instead of a review, this is a short but sweet recollection of my four day whirlwind at #SITG2016. If you’re actually interested in what nonsense I got up to, continue reading for my noteworthy moments from Thursday & Friday.

Day 1 – Thursday

  • The site is looking pristine. The grass is super green and luscious; I want to rub my face in it.
  • I’m jealous of the children in fairy light covered carriages being pulled along by their parents.
  • I notice more arts and crafts, groovy bars, beauty spots, body art stalls, creative panels and a Bohemian Lounge. They sure have upped the anti in terms of creativity this year.
  • There’s a ginormous-inflated pink poo sitting next to a stand entitled ‘Cool Shits’.
  • Fortunes, an electronic duo from Melbourne play.  Tracks Keeper, Justin Bieber and Bomber are crowd pleasers. However, I become agitated by disruptive punters that decide standing at the front of the mosh pit is the perfect place to have a drunken chat. Tip: don’t be that guy.
  • I eat my first Ya-man wrap.

Day 2 – Friday

  • We discover early that our neighbours love to chant “Boats n Hoes”, use deodorant as hairspray and argue over breaking each other’s belongings.
  • The glitter is being applied like jam on toast.
  • A campsite party erupts close by. Of course, I immediately join said party.
  • Someone throws me a Toohey’s New.
  • Melbourne quintet Total Giovanni are dressed in silky white robes with towels on their heads and sunglasses to match. Groove Factor: 50/10 and Vocals: Sexy/10.
  • Ribongia, a much anticipated producer from Sydney has DJ sets either side of Total Groovani, amplifying loads of bass and jungle juice vibes to set everyone’s Friday into motion. If you were waiting to drop your pingers, this was the set. And when I say drop, I mean down the toilet you naughty buggers!
  • A group of gentleman begin to chant “SCIENCE, SCIENCE, SCIENCE.”
  • A drunken punter notices this, runs past and starts chanting “CIDER, CIDER, CIDER!” Oh dear.
  • Today I discovered The Kills. Straight up, Alison Mosshart is a fucking badass. Pacing the stage, she takes a puff of her cigarette and throws it god knows where, and embraces the mic with full force. Usually blonde, her hair is now a firey shade of pink, adding to her already electric stage presence. I fall in love with their track, Doing It To Death.
  • I eat another Ya-man wrap.
  • Leon Bridges is next, with an all class, full brass band, back-up singers and dance moves from another century. I’m transported to the OG days of soul, rhythm and blues; a marvel to witness. During a cover of Ginuwine’s Pony, the GW McClennan tent’s sexual juju doubles. We all bump n’ grind like it’s nobody’s business.
  • For those who have never entered the Gold Bar, it is the equivalent of upgrading your shitty tent to a beach house in Byron. I enter for some good conversation, comfy couches, easy access toilets, cash bar and a possible side stage view for The Strokes. To my disappointment and entirely poor misjudgement on my behalf, the viewing platform is full. I finish my night with a Strummer Bar cocktail in hand (surprisingly passionfruit-y), singing Last Nite at the top of my lungs from behind the amphitheatre. It’s been a fantastic first two days.


For more of my Splendour escapades, read my Saturday and Sunday highlights.